My Life Monday: Decision Making

When faced with despair, there can only be a decision to be made.

To I rise above it, or do I sink to the bottom of the pit.

I'll put my hands up and admit I have been sinking. I've been sinking fast.

I am starting to turn a corner, at last. It's going to be hard work, but I am going to pull myself out from underneath the chasm I have been hiding under.

First in this step is starting to care for me again. Rather than the opinions that others may have of me. I can't change those, I can't change me. I can however be the best me I can be. At home, at work and online.

I have downloaded some inspirational books to my phone and I will take baby steps from here, and with summer coming up I may even get to grow my nails - for a little bit at least.

My Life Monday: Targets for April

So this month I am aiming to get on top of a few things.

This starts with a complete bedroom declutter.

The wardrobe has far too many things in it. Including blankets, sheets, random other bedding, enough pillowcases to cover a hotel full of pillows, odd non-matching duvet sets, suitcases, a tv from one of the kid's bedrooms and that's before you even get to the mounds of clothes.

Lots of clothes that either fit and I don't wear or clothes that don't fit and theere are rows up rows of books that need reading or bosing, donating, selling or binning. I think you might be starting to get my drift.

It feels like I'm drowning under all the stuff in there. I daren't even look under the bed! There could be a whole undiscovered civilisation living under there.

What I need to be is ruthless, someting I find tricky yet also weirdly exhilerating.

So on my To Do list this month.

Reduce surface clutter.
Organise bedding - getting rid of some and replacing the ones that have seen better days with new bedding.
Being ruthless at the bookcase and in the wardrobe.
if it doesn't fit, it must go
if I haven't worn it, it must go
Make up - compared to some I don't have much, compared to most I probably have too much and right now it all sits in a Peppa Pig shopping tote.
Tackle the drawers, junk and otherwise. They don't shut - or open.

My reign as Queen Bee Hoarder must end this month - at least in the bedroom!

Do you set any monthly goals?

My Life Monday: Get Moving

Over the weekend I decided that I wanted to do the Race for Life again this year.

I stopped running last July/August, not long after my last race.

My fitness has dropped right off. So today I have started the long road back to being a 5k runner.

I went out for a walk. It was roughly 2 miles. I didn't march it out I just took it nice and steady.

I'm planning to walk a similar distance 3 times a week until I cover 3 miles comfortably, then I will gradually introduce power walking intervals and then running until I am able to run the full stretch.

Around where I live I am lucky that we have such fantastic scenery, but unlucky in that there is no non-hillly routes!

I'm not impressed with my first time. however it can only get better!

I forgot how nice it was to just have a bit of peace and quiet time. I plugged in my ancient ipod and listened to some old Jillian Michael's Podcasts and blocked out the world around me. When I start with the running I will be moving over to more up-tempo tunes to motivate me and to match my stride pattern to.

What do you do to keep moving, and what do you listen to when you are out and about?

My Life Monday: What's Holding Me Back?

and most of the time I am my own worst enemy.

While I have been thinking about how to change things for the better. I sat down and tried to work out reasons why I don't ever seem to reach my goals.

To do this a did a quick drawing of the things that stand in my way.

There are times when I feel that my family hold me back. I have been putting them first for so long, I seem to have forgotten what being just me was like. Making decisions because I want to do something, rather than what can I do that pleases everybody else.

What I think other people think or are thinking about me stops me from living life to the full in the way that I want to live it. Last year I was severely burnt by people and how what they assumed I was doing and thinking about things.

Sleep, I simply just don't get enough. I'm out of routine, I can be up to 2am maybe 3am most mornings then don't rouse until 8am. Far too late for a simple school run, a stressed rushed one yes, but not a nice simple one.

Finally the other thing that seems to create a sticking point is money. The lack of it, the use of it, the power of it.

So my next challenge is how to tackle these obstacles...